You are unique, just like everyone else. Functionalab, a new nutritional supplement brand, takes this kindergarten maxim to heart. The personalized beauty vitamin launched at Henri Bendel’s in NYC this week, and yours truly found herself among the lucky testers. Before I go further, let me get this out of the way: Oooh, Bendel’s! This little redneck girl found it might impressive. But on to the point . . .
The Personalized Nutrition Program works as the centerpiece of the Functionalab set up. I sat down with my beauty-nutrition consultant, Simone, to answer a questionnaire about my medical history and lifestyle. How many servings of fruits and vegetables to eat a day? (I had ice cream for breakfast that morning.) How many times do I exercise a week? (Does walking back and forth to Texas Fried Chicken count as exercise?) And so on.
Functionalab Beauty Dose
After I laid my health sins bare, Simone walked to a wall of shelves containing numbered packs. According to their computer program, Pack 8 would help me the most. They have 26 different packs, all of which contain different combinations of multivitamins and herbal supplements. Simone explained that everything in the Functionalab line had been medically proven to work at its given purpose – no anecdotal evidence accepted. In Pack 8, I got heavy duty multi-vitamin, stress tablets, and evening primrose oil. These bi-daily doses come in tiny plastic and cardboard containers that make for easy transportation. I often wander lost in the supplement isles at Whole Foods, totally confused about what I need, but this has taken the guess work out of vitamins.
Health & Beauty Pack
While I felt complete with just the basic program, Simone took me through the other products Functionalab provides. If a customer would rather skip the personalized nutrition program, they can pick up a Health and Beauty Pack. These jars of vitamins gear themselves towards a specific goal, such as sports performance, weight loss, and graceful aging.
The Beauty Doses get even more nitty-gritty that the Beauty Packs. These supplements target one beauty concern at a time, such as collagen production.
Nutrient Tonic
For those of you out there who don’t care to swallow horse-pills, the Nutrient Tonics provide a reasonable solution. They offer a multivitamin tonic, but also ones for cardiac health, antioxidants, energy, anti-aging, and mental relaxation.
Health Drops
We all know green tea has numerous health benefits, but not everyone likes the taste. My mother, a cancer survivor, declared that if she had to choose between getting cancer again and drinking green tea everyday, that she’d take the cancer. Now she doesn’t have to choose. The Health Drops Antiox formula contains the antioxidant power of fifteen cups of green tea in one tiny drop. This handy form also comes in immune support, detox, and age defense.
Nutritional Supplements
Last of all, Functionalab has a range of single Nutritional Supplements. If you still feel you need a boost of calcium, vitamin B, or ginkgo biloba, you can bolster your regimen with one of these.
My basic Personalized Nutrition Program retails at $135. Pricey, but perhaps worth it. My light acne started to clear up during the second week of my supplements. Upon investigating the contents, I found that my multivitamin included 16,667 IU of vitamin A, a 333% overdose. Accutane, a vitamin A derivative acne medicine, appears naturally in the human body when it ingests large amounts of vitamin A. Unlike the somewhat scary acne prescription drug, this overdose is fairly harmless. While I enjoyed the benefits of clearer skin, I went about determining the cost of a do-it-yourself program. I even made a handy-dandy chart:
Bluebonnet Vitamin A Softgels
One-Month Supply
New Chapter Organics Every Woman Multivitamin $34.99
Bluebonnet Vitamin A Softgels $1.44
Organic Pagoda Stress-free Formula $20.99
365 Evening Primrose Oil Softgels $2.33
Total $59.75
Keep in mind, I took the four main components of my regimen and found their equivalents on the shelf, but the formulas differ slightly. Functionalab charges almost double for a similar regimen because you have to pay for their time, research, and (very) convenient packaging.
Some people believe that no one can put a price tag on good health, and I would recommend Functionalab to them. A home-made program will satisfy others, and I can’t blame them either. To each their very own vitamins.
As for me, now that I’ve covered everything, I think I’ll go get some cheese fries and settle in for a long night of channel surfing. Just kidding. Really.
